Recently, my beautiful mother-in-law passed away suddenly and unexpectedly.
Originally from the United Kingdom, my in-laws moved to America in the 90’s and, understandably, her husband of 55 years is now at a complete loss as to how he will navigate life without her by his side.
He made the decision to downsize from their large home and move to an apartment in a retirement village. He was advised to clear their home of the many personal items and ‘stage’ the home for sale.
My husband and I booked some flights and ventured over to help him with what we knew was going to be a mammoth and emotional task.
We pulled all the boxes from a large attic and from wardrobes in the spare rooms. We cleared the pantry, the kitchen cupboards and the garage. Neither of us could have prepared ourselves for the amount of stuff squirreled away over their lifetime together.
Every nook and cranny was packed; packed so well that it was like a jigsaw puzzle putting anything back. Four weeks of lugging boxes and going through every paper, card, photo, file, box , cupboard and drawer
There were receipts dating back to the 70’s and then there was the now vintage Purbeck pottery set they bought when they married – it was a bargain! We found Scout uniforms from 40 years ago, her children’s first gumboots, study notes and school reports from when she was at college, cards, cards and more cards.
Twenty years ago, my mother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer, which she overcame with a 50/50 survival rate. She kept boxes of relevant information which she collected along her journey as wells as records, journals, merchandise, pins and badges amassed during her fundraising efforts for a cure, and every year since.
Judith loved Christmas and had four Christmas trees plus hundreds of Christmas decorations and nativity scenes. She had collections of stamps, coins, Royal Doulton plates, crystal glasses and decanters, figurines… the list goes on!.
The exercise of simply going through everything she had amassed was emotional. Making decisions about what to keep was a battle between head and heart. No one wanted to throw out her memories, or the things that were precious to her but we couldn’t keep all of it either.
To anyone who has over-brimming cupboards, attics and garages, my plea is to go through your precious memories now. The one thing you can do for your children is to clean-out of all those trinkets, cards, invoices, photo and collectables you have
gathered over the years.
Invite your children and grandchildren to be part of the process and share with them the stories behind your precious keepsakes.
I also highly recommend filling your fridge with Eat meals as you embark on this process (or just in general). It is hungry work, so having something quick, comforting and nourishing on-hand to keep you fulfilled and fuelled is important.
Enjoy your trip down memory lane aided by a delicious Lamb Shank – These are memorable too!
